‘I’m tired’
Roe to step down as Beacon of Hope director
Steve Roe doesn’t have an office at the Beacon of Hope shelter.
Instead, he meets with staff, residents and visitors in a large room upstairs that that while it does have a desk in it, isn’t really his desk. It’s piled high with papers.
There’s also a large conference table, a crazy assortment of chairs, a hair stylist’s chair and tons of papers, envelopes, books and hundreds of DVDs in the corner. In the other corner, on an old couch, is a large blue stuffed animal of some sort.
He’s been at it for more than 12 years, most of that with the title of executive director, with that room and that old table as the epicenter of the Beacon’s day-to-day work. Staff calls it the “War Room.”
“I’m tired,” he said.
Roe is retiring as executive director on Jan. 1. Interim Director Brian Bidleman will take over then.
Roe’s fatigue is deeply seated. He’s been sick for the past two years. He was finally able to get a proper diagnosis only recently.
“I have leukemia,” he said. “I haven’t been able to work for four months. The leukemia has put me in a state of exhaustion. I’ve been able to work seven or eight hours this week. It would take a month to do eight hours. All I wanted to do was sleep.”
Facing a potentially fatal illness offered clarity for Roe.
“You look at your passion,” he said. “Where do you want to spend your time?”
Roe went through chemo and radiation treatments. He said his type of leukemia isn’t curable, but can be put into remission. He’s confident he’s at that stage.
Roe also wants to spend more time doing what he was doing when he opened the shelter.
“My goal is to be able to spend more time with the men and do what I was able to do then,” he said. “Ministering to the men and help like I did in the beginning.”
Roe makes it clear he’s not leaving the Beacon.
“I will never abandon the Beacon. I’m stepping down, not stepping out,” he said. “I will not take a salary and I’ll work as needed to help Brian as the director.”
His heart is being a missionary.
“My heart is downstairs with the guys doing chapel,” he said. “This is where I’m safe. It’s an opportunity to start doing my passion.”
Bidleman was selected carefully.
“Brian is 100 percent the right guy to be here,” Roe said. “I will walk by his side.”
Roe’s own personal Bible is filled with highlighted passages, bookmarks, a couple of one dollar bills. It looks like it could easily fall apart. The spine is separated from the pages.
His outlook on his work at the Beacon is found in Matthew. Chapter 25. Verse 35 and 36.
“35: For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36: I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.”
Bidleman knows it by heart.
“You did all that yesterday,” he told Roe.
Roe enjoys excellent relationships and a special rapport with the men at the shelter.
“They love him and he loves them,” Bidleman said.
Bidleman is looking forward to having Roe at his side.
“Steve’s name will always be on the Beacon,” Bidleman said. “We’ll always have a voice that we look to.”
The Beacon takes no government money. They said that donations are down a bit, a reflection of the downturn in the economy.
“We still need support from the community.” Roe said.